(Full disclosure: I recently found Season 1 of American Dreams during a visit to the local Goodwill. I’ve rediscovered my obsession and thus I have songs from the 60s as the soundtrack of my life right now. Hence the nod to Bob Dylan in this title.)
Change. It seems to be a word that keeps popping up in my life lately. I suppose that’s inevitable in teaching where the end of an academic year is always accompanied by an array of changes…but it’s been more than that too. In the past week, not 1, not 2, but 3 of my favorite priests have offered reflections on the subject. (Yes, go ahead, I know you’re all thinking it: Of course, Katie, you would have a list of favorite priests…it’s fine, I own it :-)) Our associate pastor closed out the school year with a great homily (complete with the visual aids the kids have come to LOVE when he speaks) on how change is good, even though many of us don’t really like it. Then Fr. Jim Martin posted a reflection a few days later on change; he commented on how change is perhaps the hardest thing in the world and that the bravest are those who are willing to change…and how God works through change if only we allow such conversion to take place. Finally, the fabulous chaplain of the ACE program tweeted a message yesterday (that’s right, he’s on Twitter :-)) about change. Granted his message was motivated by the fact that Notre Dame “went Google” yesterday but he offered a reflection on the fact that change doesn’t have to be scary if we aren’t afraid to ask for help. Yes, change is certainly one of those inevitable aspects of life; sometimes it’s good, sometimes not so much, but regardless it’s a reality that keeps us moving forward and makes us who we are.
Yesterday marked 1 year since my life changed in a drastic way. As my doctor so eloquently stated, yesterday was my 1-year “corn”-iversary. (And before you get too excited about being the first one to make a pun about how “corn”-y that is, sorry, the Charismatic Mass Coordinator already beat you to it!) I sat in the waiting room at 7 AM yesterday morning for my 1-year follow-up thinking about just how much life has changed in a year. Some of the changes are great (i.e. I was sitting in a waiting room feeling awake, alert, and alive…not adjectives I could have used to describe my visit a year ago), some not so much (i.e. some days I still miss popcorn and tortilla chips so much that it hurts…sounds crazy, but it’s true). A year ago today I was cleaning out my cabinets and boxing up package after package of no-longer-safe foods; I was discarding yet another set of pots and pans in favor of brand-new “contaminant-free” ones; I was beginning to lose heart and thus I sat down on my front porch with a cup of iced coffee and a word document…and thus this blog began. In the year since, change and I have been frequent friends. I adapted to my new lifestyle, I moved to a new apartment for the 4th time in 4 years, I moved to a new classroom for the 4th time in 4 years, I moved to a new grade level for the 4th time in 4 years…as you can see, change and I are well-acquainted. I can once again eat trace amount of corn: i.e. I don’t need special toothpaste and if cornstarch is a minor ingredient, I’m safe…woohoo!! Sadly they tell me such a thing will never happen with gluten or casein; I say a girl can dream. But just as the three wise priests above articulated: it hasn’t been a easy year. However, I truly do believe I’m better for it. I am happier, healthier, stronger, a bit wiser, much more well-versed in food additives and ingredients…and of course I have you lovely friends who keep coming back to read my blog. It still boggles my mind when I get emails and messages from some of you. So thank you.
Now once again, times are about to change. Last week marked not only the last day of the school year but also my last day at the school I’ve called home for the past 4 years. Yes, since the day I arrived in Baltimore, my home address has changed four times and I’ve gradually added food group after food group to the contraband list and yet one thing remained the same: every morning at around 7 AM, my car traveled to the same destination. I was greeted by the same smiling faces and supportive hugs that carried me through what otherwise would have been an impossibly challenging 4 years. And yet on Friday (well, really Monday) I packed everything from my classroom into Little Blue and handed in my keys.
|Saying farewell to my home away from home…|
Yes, this August I’m off on a new adventure. I’m moving to a school just a few miles down the road where I’ll teach slightly older students (i,e. 9th and 10th graders) and for the first time in my teaching career, math will not be one of my subjects. I’ll be teaching in the Theology department and working as an assistant Campus Minister planning retreats, masses, service projects, etc. I’m very excited about this change…but as I told the kids as they handed me heartbreaking notes begging me to reconsider, it’s also tempered by some sadness and of course, a little anxiety. As I told them, there comes a time when you know without a doubt that God is calling you to something…and even when it’s a little scary, you have to trust that God wouldn’t be leading you astray and that in the end, whether it’s a week, a month, or a year later, you’ll see how God was at work in your life during that period of change. I told them the story of how that fear of change almost prevented me from even coming to this same school which I’ve called home for the past 4 years. Back in the spring of 2010, the thought of teaching my model lessson to 7th graders and not the 2nd graders I had left behind that morning in DC induced enough fear that I turned around not once, but twice, and walked back to my car before finally mustering the courage to go ring the doorbell for my interview. Talk about the opportunities I would have missed if I had let fear of change win that day!
|Picked up my textbooks for next year…just a little light summer reading 🙂|
So, as I sit here a year after one of the larger changes in my life and on the brink of yet another one, I can say with certainty that I agree wholeheartedly with the comments of my 3 favorite priests above. Change is hard; change can be scary; but change is also the only way to grow and to discover who you are and who you’re meant to be. So whatever change you might be facing today, embrace it …even if that’s difficult to do. Clean out your cabinets of the food that’s making you sick; accept a job that intimidates you; pack up your car and move somewhere new; end that relationship you know should have ended awhile ago; pick up the phone and make the call you’ve been afraid to make…whatever it is, take a moment today to appreciate change.
|Courtesy of http://www.frenchbydesignblog.com/|
And since I firmly believe that sweet treats and baked goods can cushion the blow of challenges or hardship, this entry would be incomplete without a recipe. I know just what you need today: a cupcake. That’s right, they’re not a thing of the past…though I can guarantee if you told me that a year ago today, I never would have believed you. I adapted this from a recipe found over on another blog. They’re deliciously satisfying…though admittedly a bit more challenging than the Duncan Hines mix would be 🙂
|Yes, the only picture I have is when I made them for the HIMYM finale.
So of course I added chips to make them my “Suit Up” cupcakes…